


it's all for you

by fandomlife



Category: Atypical (TV 2017)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Compliant, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, I'll add more tags as i go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-09
Updated: 2019-11-18
Packaged: 2021-01-26 11:10:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,579
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21373186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandomlife/pseuds/fandomlife
Summary: Izzie is just jealous.From her battered life at home to her seemingly unrequited love for Casey, nothing is going right for her.(Izzie's point of view of season 3, Paige's dinner party onwards.)
Relationships: Casey Gardner & Izzie, Casey Gardner/Izzie
Comments: 8
Kudos: 222





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Thanks for checking the story out! I love this pairing and i'm so excited we got such good content this season. This story is written in third person through Izzie's eyes, centering around her interactions with Casey in season 3 and her life at home. I will be adding chapters as I go! Hope you enjoy x

Izzie wasn’t a bad person. Or at least she liked to believe she wasn’t. Sure she was a huge bitch to Casey when they first met, but look at them now! They were _fine_. Just fine. Perfect. Couldn’t be better. 

Still, Izzie couldn’t help but get excited when Casey told her about Evan standing her dad up. Evan was the biggest obstacle in her way. Her way where, she wasn’t sure, but her life would definitely be easier if he wasn’t in the picture. She didn’t hate him, though. As much as she tried to, she just couldn’t bring herself to despise a genuinely nice and caring guy, even if he has what she wants. She was just glad he made Casey happy. 

Nevertheless, if she feels tension between the two, she’d want front row seats (in the least sociopathic way possible). 

So when Casey asked her to be her date to Paige’s weird nerd dinner party, she couldn’t say anything other than yes. 

“You clean up well,” Casey said when she opened her front door. She glanced at the pie in Izzie’s hands and smirked. “So do you. Nice suit.” 

Casey twirled a little to show off and Izzie giggled. As ridiculous as she looked, she couldn’t deny that Casey looked banger in a suit. She took her hand and brought her to the living room. 

“Hey dorks, look what I found at the thrift store!” Casey exclaimed obnoxiously with the intent of annoying Paige. She succeeded. “I brought pie to make up for it.” Izzie’s voice was soft, almost directly aimed at Casey, like a mother being fed up with her problem child. Still, her grin was inexplicably big. 

“What time will Evan be arriving?” Paige asked through the screen. Izzie bit her lip to contain her smile, content with the fact that he, in fact, will not be showing up. “He’s working so uh, Izzie’s filling in,” she draped her arm over her friend’s shoulder. Izzie leaned into her and smiled fondly, “I’m her date.” She hoped she didn’t seem too ecstatic. The smile was unapologetically splattered on her face.

They took the pie into the kitchen. 

“I gotta say, this suit itches like a bitch,” Casey made a move to scratch her back, rotating her elbow almost painfully, “there’s a spot on my back I can’t quite reach.” 

“I can reach it.” Casey turned and offered Izzie her back. Izzie slowly brought her hand to the spot and scratched, excitement written all over her face. The moment was charged, and though she’d touched Casey a myriad of times, this time felt different. Intimate, like it was a force of habit between them. More symbolic and tender. She felt Casey’s body stiffen.

“So,” Casey practically jumped away from her grasp and turned to face her. Izzie quickly recoiled her arm and looked away, missing the feeling of her back muscles already. “Weird that Evan didn’t say anything about my dad, right?” Izzie knew Casey wanted to distract them from the tiny moment they’d just shared and she couldn’t blame her. 

“Yeah…He was probably just embarrassed. But he should have at least called.” 

“Right?”

“Whatever, boys are dumb,” She looked up at her taller crush through hooded eyes, “We don’t need them.” _Come on Casey, take a hint_. 

“Yeah, screw boys.” She smiled. “Thanks for being my date to this insane dinner.” She felt them gravitating towards each other. “Yeah…” she whispered, almost inaudibly. Her eyes were trailing on Casey’s lips. 

“What’s insane about it?” They both jumped.

And the moment was over. 

She felt Casey eyeing the Brie all dinner. 

“Must eat cheese,” She mocked Gretchen while finally making a move to grab the cheese that was out her reach.

“Here,” Izzie grabbed a piece. She ignored Casey’s hand and went directly to plopping the piece into her mouth. That caught both of them by surprise and they giggled. Izzie felt the look Gretchen gave them and reveled in it.

Moments later when Casey was “in the bathroom”, Evan showed up. Izzie’s heart sank and she prepared for the inevitable. Getting brushed off and ignored. 

“’Sup Izzie?” He shoved Brie in his mouth. She sighed and left the table abruptly, leaving all confused. He followed her into the kitchen. 

“Is everything okay?” He asked as if he had no idea of what he did wrong. As if him showing up without prior notice was okay. She turned to face him, unamused. 

“I mean at least you have the decency to _show up_.” She said with a little more bite than was necessary. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He was still chewing his cheese. Casey’s cheese. 

She was still eyeing him with a slight glare when she heard Casey come down the stairs and stand by her side. “Evan! Hey,” She noticed the tension between them, “What’s this look about?” Having Casey stand beside her felt empowering. She couldn’t pinpoint why, but feeling her body heat in a stand-off against Evan (Okay, dramatic, but still) was glorious.

“I was just saying I’m glad he bothered to come instead of standing us up.” She knew she was crossing some boundaries but…She didn’t care. She was stirring things up. She needed to. 

“Izzie!” Casey admonished. 

“What?” Evan asked, for what felt like the umpteenth time that evening. 

“You stood up her dad.” She saw him frown and share a look with Casey. 

“Y-you told her?” His voice seemed smaller than ever. She kept her gaze fixed on him. She’d feel a teeny bit guilty if she’d spilled a big secret Casey confided her with. She hadn’t realized it was confidential information. The last thing she wanted to do was betray her trust. 

“Uh, yeah. She’s my friend. And you never told me what happened with dad…” _Friend_.

The awkward tension and spite was simmering between the three of them. Izzie was ready to pounce when they heard Paige scream yet again. 

“Paige, sorry. I heard Evan coming so I just—“ 

“Oh so it’s my fault now?” He asked defensively, but masked it with a half-assed laugh, “Good party.” 

“Chill out, dude.” He was getting on her nerves. Casey didn’t have to put up with this. 

He glared at her, “You chill out.” She was about to grill him when Gretchen spoke up. 

“I’d be upset if I were him too. I thought you two were a couple,” She gave them a suggestive look. 

“What?” They both said in unison. For the first time since the beginning of the evening, she wished what Gretchen said was true. She realized that until then, they were a couple in Gretchen’s mind, and that warmed her heart, made her want to live in that alternate reality. She wondered who else thought they were a couple. Total strangers observing them from afar? Clayton students? Whomever did, she wished she could live in their heads. 

“Come on-“ Evan started. “Maybe I should go,” She interrupted, all too eager to get out of the awkward situation and not cause Casey any more suffering. 

“Yeah, you probably should,” Casey was distressed. That stung a little. “No, I should go.” Evan chipped in. 

And she left. 

*

The next day, she hoped she could make amends. She looked for Casey everywhere to no avail so she decided to leave it for the class they have together—chemistry. 

She felt the awkward tension the minute she sat down on her stool next to her. She kept quiet for a bit, hoping Casey would be the one to initiate conversation. When she didn’t. Izzie decided to speak up. 

“You still mad at me?” 

“Yeah,” Izzie looked away and rolled her eyes, “You were such a dick to Evan at the party. Why’d you say all that?” She whispered.

Izzie looked back at her. She was fidgeting with her hands nervously. She can’t ruin this. “Because it was true.” She shrugged. 

“It wasn’t your place.” 

“I thought it was,” Izzie knew she was bordering on defensive but she didn’t care. She was getting riled up just thinking about her and Evan. 

“Okay, I guess I just have to be careful what I tell you from now on.” _No, please don’t do that_. “Guess you do.” 

“Guess you do!” Casey imitated her mockingly. She raised an eyebrow at her questionably. “Sorry…That was childish.” Izzie looked away. _Goddammit, she’s adorable_.

*

She got home that afternoon and immediately sensed that something was off. “Cam,” She called to her 10 year old brother who was sitting in the living room, “Where’s mom?” Her heart sank when he shrugged. She knew it. She always fucking did this. 

Ever since Izzie’s dad left them a few years ago, her mother’s mental health started declining. Substance abuse, jumping from one abusive boyfriend to another, she wasn’t only subjecting herself to the danger, but her children too. Izzie resented her mother, wishing she could step up more often. Seek help, go to rehab, anything. Izzie didn’t have to do this. She was only 16 for God’s sake. In any case, she had to care for her siblings, reassure them that everything was going to be fine, like she always does. 

She went into the kitchen and saw her grandma feeding her baby sister. “Hi grandma,” Izzie approached the table and kissed the top of her head. Izzie loved her grandmother, respected her more than any other woman in her life. She was her rock. The only person she could go to when her mom hurt her again and again. 

“Hi sweetie.” Her grandma smiled up and fed the baby a spoonful of apricot paste. Izzie kissed her sister and inhaled the smell of her thin baby hair. It grounded her, made her feel at home. Her siblings are the people she cared about most in the whole entire world. 

“She disappeared again,” The old woman said. Izzie knew she was trying to hold it in, to be strong for her granddaughters. It made her tear up. “I realized.” Her voice turned somber and she swallowed the lump in her throat. She didn’t know what else to say. 

“All we can do is wait, I guess.” Izzie sighed. They tried filing in a missing person’s report a few times in the past, but they were rarely ever useful. She always turned up in a matter of days. 

“Where’s Amelia?” She inquired about her five year old sister. 

“Napping in the kids’ room.” She nodded and went to her own room to collect her thoughts and make herself comfortable. That was going to be a long night. 

* 

She decided to skip school the next day. She felt exhausted and didn’t want to deal with Casey drama on top of everything going on. 

“The kids should go to school.” Her grandma told her the next morning, “They need to feel a sense of normalcy.” 

Izzie conceded and dropped her siblings off at the local public school. When she got home, her phone rang. 

“Hello?” She vaguely recognized the number. 

“Izzie, it’s officer Addams,” She heard the man’s familiar voice and sighed deeply. 

“Mom again?” 

“Yeah…We found her passed out near the bus station. Her blood alcohol level was 0.23%. She’s lucky we found her in time.” She could hear the hesitance in his voice. The sympathy. They’ve been acquainted for a few years, he was always the one to give her news about her missing mother. 

“I’ll pick her up in a bit,” She hung up the phone and went to tell her grandma the news. 

This was routine to them at that point. Flakiness, disappearance, initial panic, coming to terms with it, waiting, phone call, disappointment, getting over it. Rinse and repeat.

On her way to the local police station, she got a text from Casey. 

_Hey, where are you?_

She turned her phone off. She couldn’t talk to anyone right now. 

She walked through the familiar hallways of the station until she found Officer Addams’ desk. Sure enough, her mother was sitting on a chair in front of him, looking dazed. She approached them hesitantly. 

She wished she could just leave. Walk out of here, leave her mom, and never come back. Go back to her Aunt’s in Florida, live on the streets of New Orleans, she didn’t care. She just couldn’t deal with this any longer. But she couldn’t. She had her siblings. She’ll wait for them to grow a bit then get the courage to get the fuck out of there. 

“Izzie!” The officer snapped her out of it, “How are you?” He smiled. Izzie eyed her mom who was avoiding her gaze, “I’ve been better.” 

She signed a few papers and escorted her mom out to her car. 

“Iz…” Her mom started, fidgeting with her hands, a nervous habit she picked up from her. 

“Don’t.” Izzie didn’t want to hear it. She was sick of it. She got in the car and slammed the door, waiting for her mom to do the same. They drove in complete silence. 

“You’re gonna have to talk to me eventually,” Her mom said when they arrived. Izzie parked the car and unlatched her seat belt. “No, I don’t.” She left and stormed into the house, ignoring her grandmother and locking herself in her room. 

She cried. Cried for her stolen formative years. Cried for the future awaiting her siblings. Cried for her grandmother’s screwed up daughter. Cried for her poor mother.

This always happened. 

She fell asleep to the sound of two women arguing in the living room. 

*

She woke up a few hours later with a pounding headache. Crying herself to sleep was never a good idea. She turned her phone back on. She had a few notifications from her Instagram and two other texts from Casey. 

_Are you coming to practice?_  
_Hey I’m worried about you. Just let me know you’re okay._

Izzie smiled despite herself and wiped the dried tears off her eyes. She texted back. 

_Sorry I’ve been MIA. I’m good. No worries._

She sighed and got up. She walked into the kitchen. Her siblings had arrived from school and were having lunch. Izzie looked around but couldn’t find her mother. 

“She’s in her room.” Her grandma stated, startling Izzie. She pursed her lips and nodded, glad she didn’t have to deal with that noise. 

She sat down at the table with Cam and Amelia, fixing herself her own plate of lasagne. 

“I got an A on my Math test,” her brother smiled at her. She put on a brave face and smiled back at him. “I’m proud of you,” she ruffled his hair. They went back to eating in silence. 

An hour later, they were all sitting on the couch, watching TV. Her grandma had put the baby to sleep and bid her goodbyes, wishing her luck. Izzie really didn’t want her to leave but didn’t fight back. Izzie was absentmindedly staring at the screen when she heard a knock at the door. 

“Hi,” Casey was at her door. Her demeanor was…nervous. Very unlike herself. “Um, hey, um,” she stuttered, “my mom wanted me to drop off these clothes for your brother and sisters,” She smiled nervously and presented her with a bag. 

“Thanks,” she took the bag from her hand, “It’s very nice of her.” 

“Yeah…you weren’t in school today,” Casey stated rather than asked. “No.” She was standing behind the door at that point, ready to disappear from Casey’s sight. She felt so small and vulnerable. 

“Is everything okay?” 

Izzie looked around her doorway and approached Casey, “No. My mom, uh, disappeared like she sometimes does, and caused a bunch of chaos like she always does. But we found her, so it’s fine.” She was shaking her head trying to convince herself more than Casey. She didn’t want to break down in front of her. “Thank your mom for these.” 

Casey was about to say something when she interrupted her. “She’s the best,” she stated solemnly. She closed the door and was once again away from Casey. 

Sure, Elsa wasn’t the best person, or wife, or mom sometimes, but it bothered Izzie how Casey rarely appreciated the efforts Elsa put for Sam and her. She would kill for a mom like Elsa. Prepares breakfast, does house chores, organizes clothes drives, is an outspoken ASD mother. Cares what her children are going through. 

Izzie stopped that train of thought. She couldn’t go there. Not now. 

She went to the kids’ room and folded the clothes, organizing them into their respective closets. She came across the purple Sal E. Sour Cream shirt Elsa explained the story behind and smiled. She definitely put that in for her. It had been stuffed in Casey’s closet for so long it smelled like her. She will be keeping that for herself. And maybe use it as a pajama top.

She was moping around later when she remembered Casey. She had abruptly closed the door on her earlier and she was starting to feel bad about it. Time away from her made her realize that she should go ahead and come clean to her. What’s the worst that can happen? She can’t hurt her more than her mother does everyday. 

* 

She drove her siblings to her grandma’s as she had been instructed to earlier and went over to the Gardner’s. Elsa opened the door and grinned at her. 

“Izzie! How are you?” Though she was smiling, Izzie sensed that the undertone of worry in her voice.

“Hi Elsa,” she smiled, “I’m good. Is Casey here?” 

Elsa nodded and pointed upstairs. She nodded and made her way to Casey’s room and knocked. “Come in.” 

“Hey,” 

Her voice visibly startled Casey, who got off her chair quickly. “Hi.” 

Izzie held in her breath and closed the door behind her. “I’m a jerk.” 

Casey could see how upset she was. “Come here,” She engulfed her in a hug Izzie never wanted to end. “You can stay here whenever you want, you know that right? Whenever you need to get away, I’m here.” Izzie felt her eyes brimming and sniffed, nodding into her shoulder. “Can I sleep over today?” She choked out. 

Casey teared her off of her and held her face, “Of course you can.” She kissed her forehead. She felt her cheeks heating at the contact.

She sat her at the edge of the bad and sat facing her. They stared at each other a bit, collecting themselves.

“What happened?” Casey’s brows were furrowed. She genuinely cared. 

“My mom never returned home yesterday, didn’t leave a message. It happens sometimes,” she shrugged, “I just feel bad for the kids, it’s scary for them.” Casey was nodding understandingly. “They’re with my grandma now, so…” She trailed off, biting her lip. “Thanks for letting me stay here.” She gave her a small smile. 

“Yeah, of course.” Casey still had that look of awe on her face, as if Izzie wasn’t really there, just an apparition. A spirit.

“And I am so sorry for how I acted at that dinner party,” she looked at her through hooded eyes. 

“Dude, it’s okay.” 

Izzie shook her head. “No, it’s not okay,” she gave herself a second to work up the courage. “I…was just stirring shit up just because…” She couldn’t bring herself to admit it. 

“What?” Izzie looked into Casey’s glazed over eyes. She wanted her to say it. 

“Because I was jealous,” She shrugged. Casey’s breath caught in her throat. “Why?” She practically whispered. 

“You know why.” 

Casey appeared to be processing the information slowly, her attention caught elsewhere. Izzie’s heart was beating a mile a minute, she needed her to say something.

“Well,” Casey stood up suddenly, startling her, “I’ll give you some pajamas and we can get to bed!” Izzie frowned when she turned to open her closet. She couldn’t say she was completely surprised. Casey was a master at avoiding expressing emotions. She just really needed a win today. She’d just have to settle for sleeping in her crush’s bed.

“Okay.”


	2. Chapter 2

Izzie woke up disoriented. That was the most peaceful sleep she’d had in months. Suddenly, memories of the night before flooded her brain. Casey. She was at Casey’s house in Casey’s bed covered in her bed sheets, surrounded by her smell. She reached out her hand to Casey, only to find the space to her right barren. She sprung up and looked around the room confusedly. No Casey. She noticed the sleeping bag on the floor, empty. 

She stood up and left the room, hoping not to run into any other Gardner, considering her attire. 

At the top of the staircase, she heard fumbling. Glancing down, she saw Casey frantically packing her bag and she all but ran down the carpeted stairs. 

“Did you sleep on the floor last night?” She smiled and stood in front of her, a safe distance away. Casey jumped and turned to face her. 

“Yeah, uh, I did. Sweaty in there, you’re like a furnace.” 

“Maybe my body’s just used to sleeping in an apartment where the heater doesn’t always work.” She laughed nervously. Casey mimicked her laugh and gave her a tight smile. Izzie felt a tinge of awkwardness between them and went down the final step to be face to face with her. 

“You alright?” She wrung her hands and looked up at her crush. Casey paused and looked at her for a while.

“Who wants eggs in a hole?” Elsa popped up from the kitchen. They both turned towards her. “Uh, I’m headed out.” 

That surprised Izzie. What was so important that needed Casey out of the house so early in the morning without saying a word? 

“So early?” Her eyebrows scrunched up.

Casey went out of her way to avoid making eye contact. Looked at the floor, the wall, anywhere but at her. “Yeah I’m behind in Econ so I thought I’d go to the student lounge and study.” She let out a low nervous laugh.

Izzie smiled and crossed her arms. Something wasn’t setting right. “You should’ve told me, nerd. I would’ve come with you.” 

Casey’s eyes remained staring at the ground before her, “Well I didn’t want to wake you up.” Another nervous laugh. “So no eggs, no hole?” Elsa interrupted again. They both ignored her. Izzie was too confused as is. 

“What about running?” 

“I’m gonna skip this morning I’m a little tired.” Izzie frowned. It was unlike Casey to turn down a run, especially with her. She was even adamant on running right after her appendicitis, for God’s sake. Something was up. 

“Of course you are, you were up fooling around with your friend all night.” Doug chirped suddenly from the kitchen. Izzie felt a blush creeping up. What did he mean? What does he know? _It’s not like there’s anything to know anyway._

Casey looked at her, rolled her eyes in an exaggerated manner as if to say _Look at dad! He’s such a goof! Nothing is going on between us aha._ “I got to go, see you,” She smiled awkwardly and dashed out the door without another word.

Izzie stood there, confused. Casey just left her in her house, alone with her parents, standing in the living room in her pajamas. She felt out of place, to say the least. 

“That was weird.” Elsa spoke up. She was still making breakfast for the rest of the family. Izzie nodded and made her way to the kitchen. “Would you like any help?” Izzie smiled at Elsa. 

“No it’s okay, honey. Breakfast will be ready in five.” She continued simmering the eggs and buttering the toast. Izzie nodded again and excused herself to go upstairs and get dressed. 

She arrived to the room and looked around. She had the place to herself. She took the opportunity to poke around a bit, nothing stalkerish or creepy, just enough to satisfy her need of intimacy with Casey. Knick knacks lay around, various posters and art hung on the walls, medals upon medals and trophies stood proudly on her dresser. The room was so inexplicably Casey. She sighed solemnly and took out her uniform from the small bag she had packed before she came over the night before. 

This was going to be a long day. 

*

Casey was nowhere in sight. 

Izzie went from class to class to study hall and still, no sign of her. They didn’t have chemistry that day either, so she couldn’t catch her there. Even at lunch, Izzie did a full sweep of their small cafeteria and still, no casey. She decided to text her…just to check on her, see if she’s okay.

_Hey, you okay? Haven’t seen you all day._

Periods passed, no reply. 

She was walking to her last class by the end of the day when she thought she passed by Casey’s fast figure. “H-“ Izzie turned to catch her friend but by the time she was turned around, she was gone. Izzie frowned and kept walking to class. 

*

When the last bell, or rather, tune, of the day rang, Izzie stood outside on the Clayton lawn. She waited for a bit, keeping an eye on every student leaving the building or loitering around campus. She stood there for a good fifteen minutes just waiting to get a glimpse of Casey. They always grouped together after school. Whatever the day, Izzie knew that she could always leave the school’s gates and find Casey waiting for her there, and vice versa.

She checked her chat with Casey and she had still not replied.

She thought they were okay last night but now, she wasn’t so sure. The iffy energy she exuded that morning wasn’t placating here, either. Was it something she said yesterday? Had she been too forward? Should she not have implied that she liked her? 

She gave up on waiting and walked back to Casey’s house. She broke a sweat when she realized that she’ll have to go back home sooner rather than later. No matter how awkward things were with Casey, she’d rather stay with her than go back to her mother’s.

She got to the Gardner’s house and entered. Elsa was sitting in the living room, scrolling through her phone. 

“Hi, Elsa,” Izzie smiled at her as she approached the couch. Elsa looked up and gave her that motherly look she always gave her. She loved that look. 

“Hi, sweetie. How was your day?” She motioned for Izzie to sit beside her. 

Izzie sat on the plush seating and sighed. “Decent. Have you seen Casey? I couldn’t find her all day.” 

“Really? That’s odd. She told me she was staying after class to run track.” 

Izzie looked down at the floor and pursed her lips. “Oh, I wish she’d told me.” 

Elsa stroked her shoulder soothingly. “I made Lasagne if you want?” 

Izzie smiled and nodded. She could never refuse a home cooked meal. 

She excused herself to get out of her uniform and quietly realized they were falling into routine. 

* 

Around an hour later, Izzie was lying on Casey’s bed when she heard shuffling downstairs. Casey had arrived. Izzie opened the door slowly to eavesdrop. Evan was with her. She heard them playfully bicker like they always did and decided she didn’t want to subject herself to anymore heartache. She went back into the room and waited for Casey herself to show up. Ten, fifteen minutes, she was still downstairs, now with Sam. 

She sighed and got up to use the bathroom. She couldn’t hold it in anymore, she’d been waiting for too long. She came out and—

_Oh, fuck._

“Oh!” She gasped, hovering over Casey and Evan, “hi.” She felt her face heating up and her heart beat pick up. This was not a pleasant surprise. 

Casey and Evan had just been kissing. They were on the bed and they were kissing and lord knows what else they could’ve done if she didn’t walk in on them in time. How did they get there so fast? She was just in there!

“Hi,” Evan reciprocated awkwardly, “How’s the bathroom?” 

She had to give it to him for his ability to small talk. She didn’t know what to say. She felt the lump in her throat but she had to power through it. She nodded aggressively, as if wholeheartedly meaning her answer. “It was…great. Thank you for asking.” She looked around the room, avoiding looking at them.

“We were just gonna…” Casey started awkwardly. “Make out a little.” Evan finished for her. His lips were drawn in a tight line. He was practically begging her to leave them alone. God, she would’ve loved to stay and ruin their fun, but her sadness overcame her bitterness. 

“Okay, yeah…okay got it,” she stuttered nervously and picked up her bag, “okay, bye,” she practically ran to the door. 

“Bye.” She heard Casey say after her. Her ears were nearly ringing and her eyes watered from the embarrassment. 

She shut the door and stayed outside, calming her heartbeat. _Great, awesome. Just what I needed._

She couldn’t believe Casey. After the load Izzie dumped on her the day before, she decided to go a whole day avoiding her and disappearing to then reappear making out with her boyfriend? Her heart ached. She didn’t know what to think. Was Casey doing this on purpose? Did she know Izzie was gonna walk in on them? Was this her way of letting her down gently? 

Did she hate her? 

Izzie was asking too many questions for her own good. She tried laboring her breathing to calm down, clueless as to why her body was responding the way it was. She hung her bag on her shoulder and went down to the living room to study and drown her sorrows in calculus to occupy her mind. 

Somewhere between limits, she fell asleep on the couch and woke up the next morning disoriented to a blanket enveloping her warm body. 

“Good morning.” 

Izzie turned around to see Elsa smiling at her. She smiled back weakly. 

“You fell asleep last night and I didn’t have the heart to wake you,” She explained, “and Casey thought it was better to leave you here for the night.” 

Izzie sucked in her breath, “She said that?” She was too fragile on that ill-fated cold morning for this conversation. Elsa’s face fell. “No, not like that, just…for your comfort! It’s a good couch!” She tried to soften the blow. Izzie shook her head and tried to smile through it. 

“I’m gonna get dressed and head to school.” She stood up and stretched, hoping Elsa wouldn’t find her rude or dismissive. She just had to leave. 

*

At school, it was just like the day before. No Casey, no chemistry class. She wandered around again, trying desperately to get Casey off her mind. 

At lunch, she found Quin and a few of her track friends eating at a table. She bought a slice of pizza and a soda and went over to them.

“Hey guys,” She smiled at them and sat in an empty seat. 

“Hey! Where have you been?” Quin asked after a mouthful of salad. 

“Just…around. I’ve been so distracted lately it’s insane. I missed you guys,” She smiled genuinely at them. She was so preoccupied with Casey and her life at home that she forgot she actually had friends to help get her mind off everything. 

They all aww’d loudly. Izzie started eating her pizza, content for the first time in days. 

“Where’s Casey?” Ashley asked. Izzie looked up. They were all staring at her waiting for her answer. 

“Uh…” She stuttered, “I-I don’t know. I haven’t been seeing her around much.” She decided to go with the half truth. No one needed to know she’s staying at Casey’s. 

“That’s weird. You guys are always joined at the hip.” Quin remarked. Izzie shrugged, unsure what they wanted her to say. She genuinely did not know where to find Casey. 

“She’s with me in English. She was pretty distracted this morning. The teacher asked her something and she looked like she was falling asleep,” Madeline remarked, “It was funny but also…what’s going on with her, you know?” 

“I guess we’ll ask her at track today.” 

That caught Izzie’s attention. Track. They had track that afternoon and Casey’s gonna have to face her once and for all. _She can’t run away forever._

* 

After school, Izzie went into the girl’s locker room to get into her track uniform. She spotted Casey at her locker. She kept staring at her until the latter turned, made eye contact, nodded quickly, and left to the field. Izzie rolled her eyes and followed her suit. 

She saw Casey setting up and stretching on the track and decided it was now or never. 

She jogged to her and starting stretching along. 

“Jeez Newton, I haven’t seen you all day. I feel like I see you less now that I live with you.” Her voice carried a light tone but she was serious. She was looking ahead at the track, preparing. 

“Hey not now okay? I’m trying to focus.” Casey sighed out. Her eyes were still narrowed at the road ahead. 

“Love our talks.” Izzie shook her head and tried not to look hurt. 

The whistle blew and they started running. At first they were running toe-to-toe but soon Izzie noticed Casey lacking behind, unable to coordinate her movements. She kept dropping the track stick, tripping on her own feet, arriving last. Casey was the team’s number one but then, she seemed dead last. It was almost painful to watch and Izzie had to restrain herself from cringing. 

Coach apparently sent Casey home early and Izzie cursed under her breath. She was hoping to catch her after practice but now Casey will get the chance to evade her yet again. 

“What’s with Casey?” Ashley asked. 

“Yeah, she’s been MIA the whole day and when she decides to show her face it’s to fuck up?” Quin snarked. 

They all laughed a bit. “Come on, that’s not fair. She might be going through something.” Izzie frowned and walked away from them. _What could that something be?_

Izzie let out her frustration into running, and after a few more laps called it a day and went to the locker room to shower. 

* 

Izzie went home. _Home_ home. Her mother’s house. She wanted to leave the Gardner’s because of the Casey tension and she was out of clean clothes anyway. She picked up her siblings on the drive back from school. 

As she parked in the driveway, reality settled in. She was about to confront her mother. She hasn’t seen her since she picked her up from the station and she had no plans of making amends. She held her breath and opened the front door, letting her siblings with their bags in first. Her baby sister was in her arms and asleep. She swallowed and walked in, hoping to avoid confrontation. 

“You’re back.” 

_Fuck._

Izzie looked at her mom and nodded. She speeded to the kids’ room and put her sister in the crib. 

“Are you not gonna talk to me?” Her mom caught her in the hallway. Izzie sighed loudly and turned to her. “What?” 

“I haven’t seen my kids in days don’t I have the right to know where they were?” Her mom crossed her arms.

“Not when you’ve repeatedly walked out on them, no. And besides, we were at grandma’s didn’t she tell you?” It was Izzie’s turn to cross her arms and size her mom up. She was slightly shorter than Izzie so she had the advantage of looking down at her. 

“Your grandma and I haven’t had a proper conversation in years,” 

“I wonder why.” Izzie rolled her eyes and made a move to go to her room. 

“Bradley’s coming over later tonight.” 

Izzie froze. Bradley was her latest boyfriend. 

“Great, then. I’ll make sure I’m not home.” She dashed to her room and closed the door. That was going to be a fuck ton to handle and she knew she wouldn’t be able to handle it. She took out her homework and tried to distract herself for a while. 

A couple of hours later, she couldn’t take it anymore. She felt like a sitting duck waiting for a bomb to explode. Her head was gonna burst. She took out her phone and tried to call Casey. Shocker, no answer. She dialed Elsa. 

“Hello?” 

“Hey Elsa, it’s Izzie. I was wondering, do you know where Casey is? She isn’t answering her phone.” 

“Oh, hi sweetie. Yeah, she’s at the Clayton track field.” 

“Awesome, thanks.” She ended the call and left her room. 

“Where are you going?” Her mom caught her on her way to the front door. “Out.” She simply stated. “For the love of God, don’t let Bradley interact with the kids.” She practically begged her mom, who nodded, frowning. Izzie left, got in her car, and drove to Clayton. 

*

It was a dark, chilly night. Izzie had to hug her jacket to avoid the bite of autumn cold. Approaching the track, she spotted Casey’s fast figure running along it. She slowly got closer until Casey came to a halt. 

“Strange time to practice,” Casey spun to face her, “but better late than never?” Izzie didn’t know where to look, she was getting flustered. “I swear I’m not a stalker, I just really had to talk to you.” 

Casey was still stabling her breathing. “How’d you find me?” 

Izzie smirked, “Do you even have to ask?” She had her hands stuffed in her jacket pockets to keep them from fumbling. 

“Elsa tracks my phone.” Casey almost smiled. 

Izzie braced herself to tell her what she was practicing in the car earlier. She got this. _I can do it._

“First off,” she was tearing up just thinking about it, “it sucks that you’re avoiding me.” She felt her voice crack and she sniffed. “I put myself out there, and I was honest with you, and for that I get the silent treatment?” Her brows were knit together and she felt her face redden. Casey was looking at her, speechless. 

“Even if you don’t feel the same, you can at least be there for me as a _friend_. You’re making me feel crazy.” Crazy in every sense of the word. Neurotic, senseless, detached, isolated, obsessed, in love. 

“Honestly,” her voice quivered, “if I knew that you were gonna be all weird and that this was gonna jeopardize our friendship, I never in a million years would’ve told you how I felt, because it is becoming incredibly clear that you don’t feel the same way—“ 

Casey cut her off. With her lips pressed to Izzie’s. She was shell-shocked at first but quickly got used to it and kissed back. Kissed like she’d been dreaming about it for months, because she had. She put all her feelings into that kiss; her love, her anger, her anxiety, her jealousy. Kissing Casey felt like coming clean, like she was revealing her cards. 

She clutched Casey’s jaw and kissed deeper, breathing heavily into their kiss. They kissed and kissed and kissed and let it all out. 

After what felt like a century, Casey pulled away. “Wow.” She smiled goofily down at her. 

“Yeah,” Izzie bit her lips, already missing Casey’s. 

“Hungry?” 

“Actually I really am.” They both laughed and walked hand in hand to her car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don't hesitate to tell me your thoughts :) x

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is bewilclerment for more content/story progress updates :)


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